Now in America and in the UK, jealousy is a green monster that most people have a strong distaste for.Here in Turkey, if you are not jealous of whom your partner speaks to, looks at, or hangs out with, it is the equivalent of raising a small flag that states, “I don’t love him/her.” It also doesn’t matter how many times you try and explain the cultural difference—they won’t change their minds.Jealousy is part of their culture and a fact of life.
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Here it is all about being continually conscious about what others are thinking, both if they see you alone with someone, or if a guy is asking you to hang out.
At the same time, typical Turkish men are not always to blame.
Furthermore, I thought that having tea or coffee with a new male friend would mean nothing because how could tea or coffee be anything but harmless?
Now, this type does not describe all Turkish men, because I have met some really great male friends while in Turkey.
I had heard stories of getting lots of extra attention from men if you were naturally blonde or red-headed, but that seemed normal since those are very distinct foreign looks.
Nonetheless, I had a rude awakening about the characteristics of typical Turkish men within the first month I lived in Turkey.
I didn’t date much in high school or at university, and I wasn’t given much attention by men. I am a self-proclaimed bookworm and nerd to the core, so nothing could keep me from the gorgeous university libraries or research lounges.
My experience with speaking or talking with guys all came from my two best male friends and my two big brothers–obviously nothing romantic or flirtatious there.
By the end of the day I would be asked by either my boss or friends if there would be a date soon. In the beginning you think you are royalty, but the best way to make sure you are safe is to use common sense.