RD: Did you get ANY messages from guys that seemed nice at all? AW: No, but the creepy messages most likely ruined it for any decent guys that might be around.
Those messages made me run far, far away from online dating.
In hindsight, I suppose if I had stayed active with it for a little longer MAYBE I would have encountered a “nice” guy.
I have to mention that I did get maybe a message or two from guys that seemed okay, but once I checked out their profiles, it didn’t seem like we had anything in common so I didn’t bother.
“We tend to like things that are perceived more fluently. “The part of the brain processing these things means it is very much an involuntary, automatic, probably largely unconscious reaction.
“This is part of the reason why ubiquitous brands are highly preferred; we see the Nike swoosh or the word Coke and it’s processed easily by virtue of its familiarity and that makes it more positive. “You have two dots and a curved line that immediately everyone processes as a smile. So yes, first impressions are terribly important.” So if plain is the new attractive, is it time to put down the contouring brush and ditch the bright red lipstick?
You can’t watch as they smile, and that smile spreads up into their eyes and transforms their face into one of the most beautiful things you’ve ever seen – a thing that warms your heart and makes you realize you want to spend more time with the person. Unfortunately, the reality is nowhere near that fantasy.
To get some insight into what women go through on these dating websites, I pulled aside one of my family members who I knew had spent some time on these sites looking for her future spouse.By the time of this interview, she had already given up and moved on, finally discovering her future husband while visiting old friends at her alma mater. Ryan (RD): What year did you sign up with an online dating website and how long did you keep your account? RD: What were the majority of messages that you received from guys like? I got some commenting on my picture telling me how “hot” I was…how “good” I looked.Anonymous Woman (AW): I can’t remember the exact year I signed up… Actually, now that I think about it, that was how most of the messages I got started.Personally, I think there is so much more to be gained from talking with someone face to face – you are able to read their body language and listen to intonation in their voice, which are much better indicators than online messages or profiles. You’re much more likely to get past the initial message if you can get a girl to first start talking to you based on interests.RD: From your experience, do you think dating sites can be at all useful for girls? I know people who have had great successes with online dating! I have a strong preference toward meeting people in person FIRST, instead of online first. RD: How did you eventually end up meeting the guy you ended up marrying?“If so, then this effect should be largely independent of gender — women should show the same preference for easily processed faces that men do.” Von Hippel said that’s not just because we are simple creatures — it’s more that our brains are so efficient, as the paper’s name, “Beauty is in the efficient coding of the beholder,” suggests.