Moms make the best lasagna and give the best back rubs. You’ll get to take part in adventures to amusement parks, the zoo and the park.
The upside of this incredibly difficult experience is that you are likely to have developed a thoughtful personality, having learned to weigh up your thoughts and opinions before you share them with others.
However, even as an adult, living in your own home and miles away from your mother, you may still carry the scars of that relationship.
Even simple independent decisions can fill them with anxiety.
They also learn to lie — to say what the controlling mother wants to hear — in order to keep her happy.
A mother with narcissistic tendencies will be largely unable to show the empathy that is so important to a healthy parent-child relationship, because she sees every request for attention by her child as competition.
A narcissistic mother craves attention and adoration that comes from her own feelings of low self-worth.
If not addressed, these problems can continue into adulthood too.
Many adults say they still panic in the face of their mother’s anger and grew up feeling they were constantly in the wrong.
Instead, day-by-day, a controlling mother implies: ‘I know who you are, and you don’t’, or ‘I need you to be this, and that is more important than what you want.’ She sees herself as custodian and controller of her child’s mind.
Having been told repeatedly that mother knows best, children of controlling parents can become distrustful of their own wants, needs and opinions.
It’s a place to vent, look for support, find resources and strategies, get relief and maybe even laugh.