Books such as Eric Berne's What Do You Say After You Say Hello?and Claude Steiner's Scripts People Live might be a good place to start for anyone interested.In a nutshell, in TA scripts are different than you've got them -- they result from longterm persistent low level programming by the parent of the opposite sex. (This model goes back to before the disintegration of the two-parent family began.) So a mother will tend to script a son to be like his maternal grandfather, possibly emphasizing his good qualities and excising his bad ones, depending on the mother's relationship with her father and her adult perspective.
Women just need to be upfront, what men hate more than anything is to be deceived.
#2 Playing Hard to get --- I don't have time for that, besides its just a deceptive as the #1 good-girl act.
Keep writing and get this stuff in the main stream where people can learn to stop shooting their selves in the foot.
I'm glad to see that someone has some common sense! My thoughts on #1 is, you can wait all you want, if she's promiscuous, I'll figure it out before her phony waiting period is over.
So I had the big birthday and coincidentally went out on a first date 10 days later and instead of heart palpitations and a low cut top, I decided to be comfortable inside and out!
I went deep inside of myself to where I truly reside and stayed there, peaceful and still.
Sex should be equal - two people wanting to be intimate with each other. To that I say...'Don't give away the salami for free'. "Why do I have to buy the cow if I am getting the milk for free? "Why do I have to buy the BULL if I am getting the beef for free? To that I say...'Don't give away the salami for free'. "Why do I have to buy the cow if I am getting the milk for free? "Why do I have to buy the BULL if I am getting the beef for free?
" You can live your life as you choose but you wouldn't get anywhere near this beef.
But because playing a game necessarily translates into masking your authentic self, these rules cannot deliver the kind of genuine partnership on which true love is built.
Instead, following bogus rules when it comes to dating invariably leads to one of two ill-fated consequences: Playing the game culminates in a kind of bait-and-switch in which one member of the new couple tends to feel duped; or one person continues to operate behind a façade so that he or she never becomes fully known by a partner and ends up locked in a one-sided relationship.
Here are 6 rules to Have boundaries while being real.